Jack The Ripper

I have an unusually large family. Hundreds of cousins. Tons that are still in Ireland. My mom and aunts still take great care to stay in touch with everyone. So it is not strange for me to get a phone call out of the blue by someone saying, "You probably don't know me but I'm your cousin and I will be in New York in a week. You think I could stay with you?" Hell yeah. You're my cousin, that would be cool. My cousin Jack is one such individual. My grandmother had a brother and four sisters. One of the sisters is Jack's grandmother. She had like ten kids who in turn each had like eight kids. The first time I turned up in Ireland, my mom gave me a phone number to call. I felt stupid because I didn't know any of these people but I called the number anyway. A bunch of folks turned up at my hotel. They drove me into the woods in the dark of night. We ended up at a little pub with a thatched roof. There were about forty people inside. Someone said, "everyone in here is your cousin." And it was true. That was only a third of them. They had come to meet me. I was shocked and overwhelmed, especially by how much they drank and partied. Wow, these are my people. I went to their homes for supper. It was a fantastic experience. So now you know why I love getting those phone calls when I hear someone on the line say, "you probably don't know who I am?" Oh yes I do.